I have said this over and over again, I am the most non-traditional girl with the most traditional girl tendencies. I love my independence but understand the reality behind gender roles (it is what it is, lets get over it). With that being said I have one question, why don’t more females cook? It seems to be that as we embrace the triumphs women have made through out history we have forgotten some of our fundamental responsibilities like cooking. As a Latina (yes I am Spanish), there seems to be this stereotype that we are raised to take care of the men of our families and become wives and mothers (this is true for most of us). If many cases we become mothers before we ever become wives, and chances are the wives part rarely happens. However, Latina women are also known for spoiling their husbands and children when it comes to food. Personally I have cannot even remember when I started cooking. Always found a reason to be in the kitchen helping my aunts (except when it came to washing dishes, I hate washing dishes). In any case I learned to enjoy and love cooking and naturally became really good at it (those that have tasted my cooking always ask for more, I have my references).
When I began dating, I quickly realized I wasn’t into Spanish guys. I don’t know why, or what it was about them, but I just wasn’t feeling them like that. In no time I realized that indeed I was a ni**a lover. As I dated these African American men they constantly complemented me on my cooking abilities and asked me why more girls didn't cook? Ofcouse this was new to me, after all in my household girls cooking was the norm so I couldn't understand why there were females out there that simply did not do it. A particular individual sat me down and told me that, most foreign girls cook, but most African American girls did not want to come nowhere near the kitchen. Again, another big surprise, because the majority of my African American friends knew how to cook, and although it was not their idea of a relaxing time, they did not refuse to do it.
So I started asking my female friends and acquaintances what was their deal with the cocina? I refused to believe it was a racial issue so I asked women without caring for their racial background. I found two main reasons.
2 Main Theories why women do not cook.
When I began dating, I quickly realized I wasn’t into Spanish guys. I don’t know why, or what it was about them, but I just wasn’t feeling them like that. In no time I realized that indeed I was a ni**a lover. As I dated these African American men they constantly complemented me on my cooking abilities and asked me why more girls didn't cook? Ofcouse this was new to me, after all in my household girls cooking was the norm so I couldn't understand why there were females out there that simply did not do it. A particular individual sat me down and told me that, most foreign girls cook, but most African American girls did not want to come nowhere near the kitchen. Again, another big surprise, because the majority of my African American friends knew how to cook, and although it was not their idea of a relaxing time, they did not refuse to do it.
So I started asking my female friends and acquaintances what was their deal with the cocina? I refused to believe it was a racial issue so I asked women without caring for their racial background. I found two main reasons.
2 Main Theories why women do not cook.
- Independence Theory: Some women feel that they are too independent to have to cook. Women have come so far in society, and being bound to the kitchen is retroactive do the progress at hand.
- I Don't know how to cook Theory: Some women simple were never learned how to move around in the kitchen. As a result they are using this excuse to justify why they are ordering take-out on a daily basis or crashing their homegirls house because she always got that good food.
Cooking for a man shouldn’t be an special act that only occurs on birthdays, anniversaries, and other special occasions. You would be surprised, how cooking amongst other things will help you get what you want (#amjustsaying). I am not saying that you should be cooking for everyone all willinillie but if you do there is nothing wrong for that. However, if you meet someone and that person is worthy of your pumpum, which means they can potentially father your children (just think about it) why aren’t they worthy of your cooking? If this person takes care of you, and is there for you, why are you being selfish and not taking care of your business in the kitchen #youfancyhuh? I encourage to bring him into the kitchen, and have him “help” even if it just to taste it. Ladies cut this out, and for those of you saying, “He better know how to cook then,” how can you ask for something you cannot provide?
Am I alone on this one? Fellas is cooking important to you? Ladies, what are your thoughts? Is cooking correlated with racial background? Share a line and leave your comments.
Am I alone on this one? Fellas is cooking important to you? Ladies, what are your thoughts? Is cooking correlated with racial background? Share a line and leave your comments.
2 comments:
In my case, my man loves cooking himself so much that he actually will push me out of the kitchen! Sometimes we even cook a meal together which I don't see too many black men and women doing. As far as those women who feel they don't know how to cook, I use this rule: ANYONE can cook. Expect to not be perfect at it, but really. If you can get a BS degree, you can handle dinner.
At the same time, being able to eat is part of survival. I feel if a man can father children, he should at least know how to feed them, and that doesn't mean just bringing home a paycheck. Minorities are already too much at risk for diabetes, heart disease, and other health problems because of our lifestyle habits. Food shouldn't be killing us because we won't take control of what we eat. Cooking is the best way to do this.
Men AND women should ask themselves these basic questions:
1. Can I boil water?
2. Can I turn over a piece of meat/chopped vegetables in a pan?
3. Can I use a measuring cup and stir ingredients?
If you can do these things, you're gonna be alright.
"Sometimes we even cook a meal together which I don't see too many black men and women doing. "
I think this is wonderful! and I encourage everyone to try this because at the end of the day you have to find ways to bond, and cooking is a good one. I agree with you, both men and women need to learn how to cook and should be asking themselves those basic questions because we all need to eat, and should be finding ways to make that happen. We have to take care our bodies and what we put in it and that is why is very important to learn how to cook, specially healthy meals!
Thank you for sharing!
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